Introverts & Weddings
Firstly – Congrats on getting engaged!
As a fellow introvert (an INFP if you're interested!), I completely understand if weddings can feel a little overwhelming. Perhaps not so much the organization part but the thought of being the centre of attention brings you out in a cold sweat, I’m here to help guide you through some areas to help calm your nerves and anxieties about your big day. After all, you deserve a day that makes you feel comfortable whilst celebrating your union.
The biggest piece of advice I can give is this -
You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do
That’s right. You can take the unique road with your approach to your big day,
Comfortable with vendors
Hire people you are comfortable with. You’ll be spending the largest part of the most special day of your life with them. So whether its, photographers, videographers, Magicians, DJ’s… make sure you like their personality and they understand both of you. If like me, you sometimes find super-extroverted people a little overwhelming, they probably aren’t the person for you.
Don’t fret on vows
There’ a reason why they say ‘repeat after me’ and that’s because 99.999% of brides or grooms at the altar are nervous as heck and won’t remember anything beforehand. I’ve done a lot of weddings and believe me… a lot of people don’t even remember moments after being told and you know what? Everyone will be sat there wishing you well and thinking loving thoughts about you both. I’ve yet to see a forgotten wedding vow turn into a disaster and many wedding suppliers will agree with that.
Get others to make speeches
Play by some different rules and get others to make speeches. You don’t have to stick with tradition.. your day, your way remember! How about Mother of the Bride, Maid of Honour speech or get all the ushers as well as the best man to make a speech? Or…completely do away with them altogether? It’s entirely up to you.
Really don’t want people looking at you? Elope! Go somewhere special and create some magic memories just for the two of you.
PS - I’ve always wanted to photograph an elopement so get in touch if you do. I’ll love you forever ;)
It’s just people that love you
You will be surrounded by people that know and love you on your day. They aren’t going to be anything but happy for you and look out for you both. If there’s a guest you had to invite because of family ties or something, ask another guest to keep an eye on them. You don’t need the stress and then the responsibility has been given to someone else. You’d be surprised at how many people are willing to help you on your big day. Especially ones that are already married – they’ll know the nerves that you are feeling first hand.
The core of anxiety
If it’s ‘anxiety’ rather than ‘shyness’, and there’s a core fear about certain issues such as ‘What if I fall flat on my face?’ then that’s a sign it needs addressing with some help from others. If counselling isn’t your route then try meditation or hypnosis. Your partner should help ease any fears and remember – you’ll be with them all day long and safe. Plus you’ll also have your ‘team’ with you… the bridesmaid/ushers who you appointed to help you get married. Remember – You’re safe!
Schedule alone time
Need a breather? As a photographer that’s also what I’m here for… we can go off for ‘photos’ to give you both a chance to breathe and relax. Whether its ten or thirty minutes you can take what you need.